"I hope this fishy smell is coming from the ocean"
"I will never look back and regret this phase of my life"
"These cats look delicious"
"I'm so glad she went with the colors white and poop."
"I got dibs on my cousin."
"You think this weather is miserable, just wait til your married."
" I thought the teal shoes would distract from my fat wife."
"How long do I have to pretend to dance until she'll blow me?"
"I probably could have bought a 60" TV with this money."
"I can't wait to read your sign when we're having gay sex later."
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